by Conor McCarthy | Oct 15, 2016 | Nonsense
The world is a dark, mean, ugly place. If you ever have any doubts of that, just watch The Hills. It’s a show about beautiful rich people that MTV decided to make famous. Truly, there is no such thing as real justice. And that’s especially true with you, neoliberal...
by Conor McCarthy | Oct 15, 2016 | Nonsense
December 31st is upon us and with it comes an evening of binge drinking, bad decisions, and then the declaration of resolutions to never again make those bad decisions. Some of us will go to a bar or club. Some will attend a party at a friend’s residence. Some will...
by Conor McCarthy | Oct 15, 2016 | Nonsense
Let’s get one thing straight from the get-go: this guide isn’t written from personal experience. I am from Texas and Kent is from Texas’ attic (also known as Oklahoma) and everybody knows people south of the Mason-Dixon line are born with a certain charm that the...
by Conor McCarthy | Aug 28, 2016 | Nonsense
Yes, yes, I know. It’s been a long time since we’ve spent some time together, talking through our problems and becoming better people. I apologize for the hiatus of my massive wisdom. I’ve been busy writing my autobiography How to Cope with Being Awesome: The Life of...
by Conor McCarthy | Aug 28, 2016 | Nonsense
Reading this article has transmitted the Ebola virus into your bloodstream. You are going to die. April Fool’s! Got you! Hilarious, right? A lot of your friends are going to think so too, and so I’ve created a guide in order to prepare you for what will no doubt be...
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